The night is loud
through the window;
the rolling waves of cars
coming for the wall
adjacent to my room
into my heart -
I always knew a car
accident would be the death of me.
I can feel it inside
I can feel it in the hurricane
in my heart.
I can feel it in the wind
in my lungs.
I can know it in your face
your sad, sagging pout.
I can know it in your pores
trying to get me out.
Am I system?
Are you on overdrive?
Do I make you feel contagious
when you're kissing that other guy?
Do I make you feel alive?
This night, on the second month
on the fourteenth day,
I will think of you, won't I?
I will miss you every night
from here on out, for another year.
I'll follow a routine
You're not on my team
rooting for me
or hoping to see me
any place
anymore.
The night is loud
but so am I
I'll scream to the traffic passing by
"Don't you wish he was your guy?!
He was mine at one time."
And finally,
the night is quiet
with only the echoes of crickets
and your bouncing laugh
in my dreams.
The night is loud, I said,
but the world around me sleeps.