Forever

Two drinks deep
not deep enough.
I need some sleep,
but not too much.
Heavy hearted
plenty to feel
light on my feet
stealing away again.
Out into the darkness,
with no eyes watching
just remembering things
I'd said, done
felt, made you feel
corporeal, they were real!
I swear they were real.
Moved to tears, moved to your knees.
Another night,
begging forgiveness,
baby please.
Not tonight,
okay, tonight.
Not tonight,
another night.

No Returns or Exchanges

Insomnia, I can't sleep
I don't want to because I can't dream.
Everything I've wanted,
well, reality.
Everything I've ever thought of,
well, the truth is more frightening.
Everything I've done
all comes back in my sleep.
But dreams are supposed to be
just synapses crackling.
But they all make sense.
I can draw the lines
between your mind
and where mine connect.
I can build a sand castle
of all my thoughts
a kingdom I'll erect.

I can sleep, I can't dream
I can sleep, I can't live.
I can't breathe, I can find
the limit in my limbs.
I can find the inside
but I get lost every time.
I can't find the outside
because its blindingly bright.
I don't sleep because robots
they don't function while wet.
I cry every time
my head touches the bed.
I can lift a blue whale
I can excavate dinosaur bones.
But the things that I've done
well, they can't leave me alone.
I don't dream because everything I am, I once wanted.
And now that I have it,
well, I want to return it.

PLANKTON

I guess it was decided
for me,
to hide what's underneath the surface.
to float beneath what's left.
I stick around,
I sink under
like plankton
pushed back and forth through the lazy currents
no one really cares
no one really sees.
What whales do notice
most people can't.
Ironic, you'd think
that it takes something so big
to notice something so small.
But like cetaceans gliding through the water
I have no control
over the place I am in
or the places I'll see.
My fate in the hands of the ocean.
My life drifting in the sea.