The white castle,
melting icicles
is as icy as the road.
The road that leads you there
the road that led you
from wherever it is you come from
is hidden beneath the snow.
So how did it go?
How did you come?

Its u.

I miss you
I kiss you goodbye
You're off to that other guy,
the one you left me for
before you knew he existed.

I know what you need
you need someone, not me
someone who'll love you
and need you
and see you for you
instead of as Play-Doh,
oh, no,
I've done it again!
I've turned all my boyfriends into tasteless, nontoxic types.
Whatever color, or shape, or picture I want.

But still - its always you I remember.
Its always your color, your shape, that frame that you filled.
Its my insides you've killed.
Its the foundation I've built
its all the emotions I've drowned out with dreamless nights.

Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
Its you
.

$$$ Love

I put my money where my mouth is
I keep it going south
I hold six dollars up, you'll give it up
because you know no other way to make six bucks.
Your fake surprise, that O shaped mouth
I've seen it before -
maybe some porno mag
on another face at a different time.
The repetitive bass beat
beating on your knees
through your teeth
past your tongue and tonsils,
to the music-maker of your body.

I'm jealous of your breath,
to be inside you,
must be the most luxurious of cages,
pull me in! Pull me in. Suck me in.
I'm a million dissolving atoms
breaking down with every explosion within.
Dollar signs go off in your eyes,
spinning around your head like cartoon butterflies.
And is it your fault or mine
that your insides are all black?
Cigarettes dragged across your throat
like matchsticks on flesh,
the spark of a million atom bombs going off.

What you are, I didn't make you
I joined long after the party started,
but I'm glad I'm came, and you came
and we're here, all the same
lying on your bed, your head in my lap.
Blowing smoke rings up into my face.
I get tunnel vision.
I shrink again, but the darkness
between both of us
is indistinguishable from being inside you.
So what's the difference?

I've seen what you are,
and I love every second of it.
I've seen what you do,
and I want to be part of it.
These black tunnels, well, they're just the pathway
and you're just the vessel.
I was already on this road -
nothing will keep me away.